Monday, March 16, 2015

Baring it all (under the cover of course)

This was my view yesterday afternoon. It might not look like much, but to me this was a wonderful site and a major accomplishment.

It was a beautiful Sunday afternoon and I was sitting on a park bench while Scott played with Julie and Johnny. And I was nursing my baby Josie.

As unfathomable as this might sound coming from a mom of almost a decade---this was the first time I had EVER nursed in public. Of course I had my cute little nursing cover hiding any skin and the park bench was out of the way a bit. But, this was huge for me.

I've always been completely self-conscious about nursing in public. Let's be honest. I'm completely self-conscious about a lot of things. I was born worrying about what other people think of me. So, to feed my baby from my boobs in public was terrifying. Add in the fact that I haven't always been a great breast-feeder. With the other two, I just couldn't seem to get it right. They weren't comfortable. I was miserable. Many feedings ended with a screaming, frustrated baby and a sweaty, defeated me. Not something I really want strangers witnessing or commenting on, so I kept those sessions behind closed doors.

I finally feel a little confident that I might be getting it right this time around. So, I decided I would do it. I would feed Josie in public whenever she's hungry. She ate. I enjoyed the beautiful weather while the other kids played. No one pointed at me and glared at me or scowled or whispered mean things.

It was quite peaceful and pretty enjoyable.

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